**note this was written but not released on it’s origination date**
31-July-2022 – nothing like a phone call to interrupt an evening with your family. It’s 7:01pm and my sister’s name shows on my caller ID. I really didn’t want to deal with this crap, but I couldn’t ignore the call. It had been 9 days since my STATEMENT was sent to her attorney and 5 days since it was entered into probate. Our last exchange ended with her emoji’s. I knew when I answered the call, I was not going to get answers nor was there going to be a resolution. It was a formality.
Basically, the 41min and 11sec call was just what I expected it to be. She hadn’t called me because she felt there was a ‘leak’ and our brother was up to no good because of the filing. Without straight out accusing me of being a potential leak, I was lumped into the “did not need to know” category and deemed, based on her attorney’s, not necessary in the case. It wasn’t about the case or being needed. I disagreed with her and her legal advice. It was about showing unity and while I know daddy would be so upset at this happening, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt he would NOT condone the things our brother is doing [has done] and he would expect us to stand up for ourselves. We actually agreed on that. I don’t have any desire to be battling my own siblings in court. I also don’t have a desire to be looked over and treated as if I, nor my feelings, does not matter. Of course, she told me that when it comes to the probate case I will still be heard because I’m mentioned in the will.
Now, I have to give a little backstory here. My family is notorious for not talking. We were all taught to pretty much pretend things didn’t happen and ignore the big elephants in the room. Over the years, things were said and done and the victim would never be allowed to discuss the issues ever again. While I am not great at talking about problems and I do tend to want to keep things private but I am not above getting in my opinion when something gets under my skin. As the elder of the three, I feel that it is my God given responsibility to protect my siblings, even if it is from each other. My brother has been bullying our sister and I told her I wanted to help and stand up to the bully. She didn’t take to kindly to this statement and went on to tell me I didn’t have the right to swoop in like some super hero sister and fix things. In fact, I wasn’t “swooping” in, I was responding to a problem because I had been called when our brother alienated her from mama. I could have turned a blind eye and let her hash it out but in reality, wrong is wrong and I never liked being alienated so why should I sit back and watch someone go through something I didn’t like going through? I tried to help and now I am sitting here listening to the person who called me try to minimize my value as a caring human being. Yeah, I was quiet upset. I kept my cool and didn’t unleash the bear that I have been accused of being. I did, however; defend my actions with the explanation of it being my God given right to defend her against our brother because he was wrong and because she called on me.
I went on to tell her, I had come to accept the very sad fact, that though I wanted a relationship with my siblings in some capacity, after this series of events, there will NEVER be a relationship between the three of us in any way, shape or form. Sadly, she agreed with that statement.
It breaks my heart to have to let daddy down again. He had always told us, “one day, all you will have is each other”. I had come to understand what he meant by those words. I saw it as I grew up, had my own kids and watched as the family fell apart after he was taken away so soon. Now, here we are divided and falling further apart.
The call ended but I made sure to convey that I didn’t like how things were going and she would always be my sister. I felt that we wouldn’t have any conversations in the future unless it was legally required and it wasn’t what I wanted. I’m not the enemy.
“There is no greater blessing than a family hand that lifts you from a fall;
http://www.wisesayings.com/family-betrayal-quotes/?sm=32832#32832
but there is not lower curse than a family hand that strikes you when you’re down.” – Wes Fessler
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